just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
It's official drugs can't kill me
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize
