i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Randomize
