she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
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I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
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