My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
