it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
This is the high leading the old right now
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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