I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
please come you make the beer taste better
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize
