I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
