You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize