she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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