I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
