haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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