i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize