Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize