It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
the liver wants what the liver wants
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
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