his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
