I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Come see our sink grown plant.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Randomize
