Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize