...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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