Im at strip club and am horny
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
