he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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