My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize