Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(310): View more from California

The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.

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(702): View more from Nevada

Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride

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(407): View more from Florida

Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.

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(404): View more from Georgia

NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR

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(719): View more from Colorado

Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great

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(915): View more from Texas

It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!

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(860): View more from Connecticut

I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.

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