You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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