I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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