a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize