Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
