He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
