nut hugger
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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