At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
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