i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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