I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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