just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
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