He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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