If that was your dad, he is hot
wakey wakey hands off snakey
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize