He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
