that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
