her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
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