I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
