So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
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