So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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