my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
