I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
