omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize
