My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
