Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Randomize
