dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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