I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Randomize
