I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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