I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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