I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
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