I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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